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This hilarious rabid raccoon shirt is perfect for those who bite back with sarcasm! Featuring a wild-eyed raccoon and the phrase “If I Ever Get Rabies, You’re High On My Bitin’ List,” this design is made for people with a twisted sense of humor and a love for chaos. Great for casual wear, gifts, or making passive-aggressive statements loud and clear.

✔ Bold black-on-red print
✔ Soft, breathable fabric – perfect for daily mischief
✔ A must-have for introverts, animal lovers, and petty legends
✔ Makes a killer gift for friends who thrive on dark humor


• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
• 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala

Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

Size guide

  LENGTH (inches) WIDTH (inches)
S 28 18
M 29 20
L 30 22
XL 31 24
2XL 32 26
3XL 33 28
  LENGTH (cm) WIDTH (cm)
S 71.1 45.7
M 73.7 50.8
L 76.2 55.9
XL 78.7 61
2XL 81.3 66
3XL 83.8 71.1

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